Pressing the right buttons
I get worse, in my old age.
The phone rings, right – I’m packing up some books, and at the same time trying to watch the news out of the corner of my eye, so I need to turn the volume down before I answer it.
Point TV thingy at TV, press button. No result. Realise I’d picked up mobile phone instead of TV thingy. Think – Silly old Sod! Put down mobile. Pick up thingy. Press button as before. No result, as before. Realise I’m holding pocket calculator. Throw same at wall, with torrent of fluent Anglo-Saxon commentary.
Meanwhile, phone has stopped ringing.
Dial 1471. Get strange noise. Realise I’m holding mobile instead of landline phone.
Screw’em. I didn’t want to speak to ‘em anyway. Whoever it was.
Some days one just shouldn’t get outta bed.
The phone rings, right – I’m packing up some books, and at the same time trying to watch the news out of the corner of my eye, so I need to turn the volume down before I answer it.
Point TV thingy at TV, press button. No result. Realise I’d picked up mobile phone instead of TV thingy. Think – Silly old Sod! Put down mobile. Pick up thingy. Press button as before. No result, as before. Realise I’m holding pocket calculator. Throw same at wall, with torrent of fluent Anglo-Saxon commentary.
Meanwhile, phone has stopped ringing.
Dial 1471. Get strange noise. Realise I’m holding mobile instead of landline phone.
Screw’em. I didn’t want to speak to ‘em anyway. Whoever it was.
Some days one just shouldn’t get outta bed.
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